Florida Agenda

Dear Editor,

Regarding a recent column by A.J. Cross, please “stop the insanity!” I can’t tell whether Cross needs a hug, a strong cocktail, or an intervention. About a month ago (Florida Agenda, Feb. 9, 2012: “Cross-Eyed: I Don’t Want to Be Gay”), I read his described attempts to apparently seduce a very confused man who hasn’t yet made up his mind whether he is gay or straight.

While most gay people can relate to the pain and confusion associated with coming out, for some people this is a life-long struggle, and these individuals deserve our sympathy as they decide how they should best live their lives.

The writer, while perhaps not meaning to, comes across as a predator exploiting a confused—and clearly emotionally-unavailable, to anyone—person more in
need of counseling than friendly advice from someone who seems to be looking to get into his pants.

Clearly this person, as described by Cross, is screwed-up: he is 28, dating a 49 year old woman as well as Cross who I gather from his other writing is somewhere in his late 30s or early 40s.

While the subject of his ‘affections’ is certainly in the throes of getting his head on ‘straight’—so to speak—the same can’t be said about the nameless woman, who appears to be a case of ‘Fag Hags Gone Wild’ (shocking!), while Cross appears to be in need of a good talking-to. The object of his affections has an excuse for being a “borderline” personality. What is Cross’ excuse?

David,
Wilton Manors

Dear Editor:
Regarding your report covering Broward County’s hate crimes numbers for the last reported year (“Broward County Sheriff on Hate Crimes: ‘We Don’t Want to Be Number One’”), during the Matthew Shepard trial, Chastity Pasley and Kristen Price (the respective girlfriends of killers Aaron McKinney and Russell Henderson at the time of the event) testified that Henderson and McKinney both plotted beforehand to rob a gay man. That’s what sealed the fates of those murderers even before any hate crime legislation had been enacted. Hate crimes legislation is intended to bring awareness to people and declare that the United States does not tolerate socially-targeted hateful acts. It proves the point that some crimes are perpetrated out of hatred for any given social class and that we, as a society of civilized people find these crimes to be particularly offensive.

Unfortunately, some people don’t completely get it. They believe that the point of hate crimes legislation and reporting is to issue that “extra punishment” for the perpetrators. Obviously, prosecuting attorneys have come to see the classification as a tricky bonus round in the game we call justice. The Broward Sheriff’s Office seems to ascribe to that latter definition. I’m sure this belief is popular in Tallahassee as well. It would be quite convenient for Florida’s Republican legislature and the taser-happy cops of North Florida to think of hate crimes reporting as something that’s sort of pointless and excessive. I don’t mean to imply that BSO doesn’t take hate crimes seriously and is concerned. But at the same time, there is evidence that BSO still might need some improvement in this department when compared to their peers. In a report issued by the Florida Attorney General’s office in 2008, only 4 hate crimes were officially reported by the Broward Sheriff’s Office. However, 25 hate crimes were reported by city police within Broward County. These numbers may be getting better—maybe—but there is still room for improvement.
- Jim, Oakland Park

In response to the cover story “Orlando’s Partner Registry” in the Florida Agenda, December 29, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,
The story in your December 29 issue about Orlando’s same-sex partner registry (Dec. 29, 2011: “Orlando Partner Registry has no Shortage of Applicants, Floridians or Otherwise”) put me in mind of those supermarkets that ask you to swipe a “fob” at the cash register in order to receive a discount, or earn extra coupons, or green stamps, etc.

My boyfriend loves to ask the cashier why we have to belong to their “stupid club” (his words) and clutter up our key chains just to pay the same price for eggs or laundry detergent that everyone else is paying.

I think you can see my point here. Although I’m perfectly happy to pay nine cents less for a five-pound tub of margarine, shouldn’t everyone have to/get to pay the same price, regardless of one’s preference to key-chain fobs? The fact that Orlando’s leaders are both gay-friendly and long-viewed doesn’t minimize the huge disappointment and dismay I experience to know that this is just another in a long list of feel-good “booby prizes” like civil unions, domestic partner lists, and half the programming on Bravo-TV to keep “The Gays” happy, mollified, content, and, oh yes, voting Democratic. (No, Virginia, there is no Santa Claus here for the Republicans: I keep a picture of Dick Armey in my garage to remind me of his ‘big-tented’ “Barney Fag” comment from the 1990s.)

I don’t want to sound ungrateful. Any strides made in this direction are naturally “good” strides. But I still feel kind of ‘icky’ in a Step-and-Fetch-It way when I think of how well-meaning “The Straights” are to grant us the same benefits (access to hospital visits, medical care, etc.) that I already enjoy at the animal clinic with respect to my Pekinese.

One day at a time, though, right?

NAME WITHHELD
Wilton Manors

DEAR EDITOR:
I just received a mail piece (or was it an email) reminding me that PrideFest 2012 is just around the corner, with an appearance by musical headliner Taylor Dayne! Spoiler Alert: I am a gay man, proud and happy to report that all of the people in my life who matter to me the most (parents, employer, minister, mailman, etc.) know about my lifestyle and consider me with the same love and affection (and on occasion, the lack of same) that they reserve for my hetero siblings. My partner and I hold hands (when appropriate) not just in the “gayborhood,” but at the mall, going into restaurants or movies, etc.

It “ain’t no thing” to the vast majority of people we encounter, and I know in my heart and mind that I owe many of the trappings of tolerance to those pioneering LGBTs like Harvey Milk, and Harry Hay, and others who came before me. I also put my money where my mouth is when it comes to HIV/AIDS service organizations and helping those members of my community less advantaged than me. This is a long way of saying that, while I am “proud” to be a gay man, at this stage in my life, and the life of our community, are events like Pridefest and Stonewall Pride still relevant?

At a time when Disney and the rest of Central Florida unofficially “hosts” Gay Days for God’s sake (sorry , Fred Phelps), and young gays parade thong-side next to Mickey and Minnie at the Grand Resort pool, isn’t there a better way to spend our time, efforts, and resources than on events that are ‘quaint’ and ‘’ at best. I love my boyfriend, my family, and my life. Isn’t that in and of itself a “Pridefest?”

George

Margate

Please send all your comments and letters to Editor@FloridaAgenda.com

In response to the cover story “Raising Red Ribbon Awareness” in the Florida Agenda, December 1, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,
I was surprised to read in the Florida Agenda last week that HIV/AIDS has been around since the 1930s. Your historical timeline was informational and interesting. I attended the World AIDS Day rally at the Shoppes of Wilton Manors and was pleased to see such a wonderful turnout. It seems that people are more aware these days, or are just more open about it. I hope that everyone was there to support those who live with HIV or whom they have lost, and not just to see Margaret Cho.

Sincerely,
Jim Politano

In response to the news story “Few Americans with HIV Have it Under Control” in the Florida Agenda, December 1, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,
As a gay man living with HIV in America, I find it disturbing to hear that only 28% of the 1.2 Million Americans living with HIV/AIDS have it under control. Does that mean that those who have the disease don’t take their meds? Do they have access to the proper medications that they need? In these times of economic hardships, it can be difficult to get the medicines they need. So if the CDC wants to help curb the spread of this disease, why can’t they put more money into programs like ADAP or Ryan White

? We’re going to war in countries most of us will never go to, and yet one of the biggest fights we’re fighting at home, is the fight against HIV. Every month, for many of us, it’s a fight to get out of bed, let alone fight for our meds.
Sincerely,
K.E.

In response to the news story “Ricky Martin to Join the Cast of ‘Glee’” in the Florida Agenda, December 1, 2011.

Ricky Martin is going to join the cast of “Glee” next year. Really? Is that so newsworthy?
Anonymous

There are several ways for you to comment on what you’ve read in the Florida Agenda: e-mail your comments and
criticisms to editor@floridaagenda.com.

In response to the cover story “White Party Weekend” in the Florida Agenda, November 24, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,
Thank you so much to your writer for the very thorough and informative piece about the White Party Weekend. As a relative newcomer to South Florida, it was nice to understand what the White Party was about, I had obviously heard of it, but it was really great to feel part of such an amazing initiative and found the article so thorough in detailing all the events and the timeline!

Sincerely,
L Grick

In response to Editor’s opinion “Pink Picket Fences” in the Florida Agenda, November 24, 2011.

Dear Editor,
I found your Pink Picket Fence opinion an interesting take on the current situation facing many people in the gay community. I have been with my partner for 15 years and we have a child together.

We are both from upstate New York and moved to Florida because we felt it would be better for our daughter. We have always had her best interests at heart, but we have struggled here in Florida, due to the cost of housing and our own picket fence.

I appreciate you acknowledging that though we seem to be living that American Dream, it is not all it has cracked up to be. We are grateful for our lives, but our dreams that have no come true aren’t as we had hoped and don’t look like we thought they would.

Sincerely,
M. Wildey

There are several ways for you to comment on what you’ve read in the Florida Agenda: e-mail your comments and
criticisms to editor@floridaagenda.com,  or you can go online to our website at www.FloridaAgenda.com and comment on the pages there. You may also “like” our facebook page and post your comments there at www.facebook.com/FloridaAgenda

In response to the news story “ABC Anchorman Comes Out on National TV” in the Florida Agenda, October 20, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,
Good for Mr. Kloeffler! More LGBT people in high profile jobs need to identify as gay to let the gay youth know that many of us succeed.

Sincerely,
Larry Searles

In response to the news story “Broward County LGBT Community History Project Local Historian Looks to Chronicle Our History with Community’s Help” in the Florida Agenda, September 22, 2011.

Dear Editor,
I had opened a gay bar in 1963 on 441 called the Wine N Stein. To keep the straights out, I turned into a private club and within one month had over 250 members. I charged $1.00 per membership.

I would be glad to help Fred Frejes accumulate facts about gay bars at the time.

We had free Sunday brunches, and the dance craze was the Hulley Gulley, which everyone did as, I allowed dancing in the bar. We had a couple of incidences from some straights, that made the papers at the time. Including one my doormen getting stabbed, fortunately he recovered. If he would like to contact me I would be glad to let him know the history of the place.

Sincerely,
Chuck Stuparits

Thank you for all your great letters. We want you to keep them coming! If you have comments on, or questions about anything you’ve read in the Florida Agenda, write to us! Send your e-mail to editor@floridaagenda.com with your comments, criticisms, and opinions.

We may end up using your letters and comments in a future issue. Thanks again!

Please send all your comments and letters to Editor@FloridaAgenda.com

Please send all your comments and letters to Editor@FloridaAgenda.com

In response to the Op-Ed, “Forgiveness: The Gift You Give Yourself” in the Florida Agenda, September 15, 2011.

Dear Editor,
Thank you for the piece by Sam Knew about forgiveness, it really made me think, I have been holding a grudge for a long time, and just reading the detrimental effects so clearly I have realized I am not punishing him but myself. Thank you again Sam!
SINCERELY,
Chris H

In response to the cover story, “Gays Worse Than Terrorism” in the Florida Agenda, September 15, 2011.

DEAR EDITOR,
I was so shocked to read Sally Kern’s comments in last week’s issue. With people like her influencing the judgement of so many it isn’t any wonder that attitudes towards Gay people are still slow to come to the point of equality. I know you guys have a duty to print the breaking news but it was really a wake-up call to see that headline on one of “our” publications. How can someone go around in modern times spouting such utter hateful and cruel statements and not be reprimanded in some way. Freedom of speech obviously has its major downfalls. Furthermore for her to blame HIV/AIDS solely on gay people is not only cruel and hurtful,  it is also completely factually incorrect.

If she  bothered to do research of even a scratch on the information available she would see that the diseases affects all people, unlike her it does not discriminate.  Thank you for printing this, but we must come together to ensure people like Sally don’t have an arena or audience for her venomous speeches!

SINCERELY,
Troy Cook

In response to the Cover Story, “A Tale of One City Divided” in the Florida? Agenda, August 11, 2011.

Dear Editor,

Let me understand what happened…

Businesses in Wilton Manors are struggling. Unless they are alcohol related they seem to be closing faster than new business opening. Many spaces promote Coming Soon but realistically they have been Coming Soon for so long I have doubts the doors will open.

WMBA, a private organization of WM businesses, invites Representative Allen West to speak to them. Being a member of a small business committee in Washington DC he could enlighten the WM businesses on government programs and opportunities to help them survive during these challenging economic times.

What bothers me most is that a group of individuals decided that the WM business community should not have this opportunity. An opportunity to collectively hear what assistance is in place and what Washington DC has learned in what works and what does not in assisting the business community, helping Wilton Manors.

Instead this group of individuals threatens OUR struggling businesses with boycotts and a “gays built this town and can destroy it” attitude. Really? When I read that in your previous article I fell out of my chair. Is that what we are about? As you travel down The

Drive, ask yourself how that is working out for us?

Look, I consider myself a Democrat and am NOT an Allen West supporter, never voted for him, never will. I think it sad that our business community, that we need for our tax base and growth for the Island City to prosper, had an opportunity for help and others with another agenda took that away.  Hopefully we all learn from this experience.

Thank you.
Michael Helms

Please send all your comments and letters to Editor@FloridaAgenda.com

In response to Editor’s Opinion “Split the Difference?” in the July 14th Issue of the Florida Agenda.

Dear Editor,
How are you this morning? I am feeling great after reading the wonderful comments you made in the newspaper.  You talked about the “friends” who love to take advantage of their real friends; we have a lot of those in Ft. Lauderdale. I have already sent a photocopy   to one of my dear friends, hoping that they will reflect on it .Great comments! I love you more and love the Florida Agenda. Please keep mentioning things like this, it will help to improve the relationships in the community.

Thank you so much.
L. Montaya

DEAR?EDITOR,
I would like to commend you for your excellent editorial – “Split the Difference”.  We have encountered so many situations similar to those that you described in detail.  The appeal of organizing a positive social gathering has been greatly diminished by the “me first” attitude that is so often demonstrated these days. Greed and gluttony and, in other cases, parsimonious behavior, so often destroy what had been an enjoyable gathering until the bill arrives.  Thank you for discussing this boorish behavior.

Making and keeping friends becomes even more difficult when people act without considering others.

Regards,
K. D. Gerhard

In response to the artcile “Taxpayer Dollars Wasted? Penis Study Puts Government In Hot Water” in the July 21st Issue of the Florida Agenda.

Dear Editor,
Since the paper wasn’t published in an open-access journal, regular Joe Taxpayer has to pay the publisher to be able to read the results his 9.4 million in tax dollars supposedly were used to produce. If I’m being robbed at gunpoint by the IRS to study penis sizes I should at least be able to read the raw results without needing to belong to a university.
Sincerely,
Irwin. S

Photo: Ken, Dave, Kenney & Jim at this year’s Gay Days at the Magic Kingdom.

In response to the Editorial by Alex Vaughn, “Let Them Entertain Us”, Florida Agenda, June 2nd.

DEAR EDITOR,

We just finished reading and enjoying your recent article, “Let Them Entertain Us”. Your words were illuminating and your analysis was perfect.

Thank you!

TONY AND GLORIA

In response to the Gay Days Special Feature “Beginners Guide to Gay Days” in the Florida Agenda, June 2nd.

DEAR EDITOR,

Thank you so much for publishing the guide to Gay Days at Disney. I went with my partner, as it was our six month anniversary and we wanted to do something different. We knew about Gay Days obviously but the guide that you put in the Agenda really helped us in finding out in advance what we could expect. We had a blast at the Parliament House for the Salt N’ Pepa concert. It was a thrill to see a group we had grown up with. The weekend was incredible. The host hotel and the expo were great and it was nice to see local friends Terry DeCarlo and Bill Huelsman and the gang from the Pride Factory in attendance showing their pride. Thank you for helping us celebrate.

KEN AND DAVID

In response to the “Scarlett Men” in the Florida Agenda, June 2nd.

DEAR EDITOR,

I have come to really enjoy your fashion features so you can imagine my disappointment this week when I read your Style page all about being “Red” and your pics were not. Though I understand publishing, it would have been nice to actually appreciate the “Red” products you were recommending. Thank you.

TOM PAYNE

Please send all your comments and letters to editor@floridaagenda.com